#unfiltered #cancertalk #mumbojumbo

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was cleaning up my dropbox and reading through some raw material i have been typing out this past year- the randomness in my head is ALOT these days- getting geared up to put more into writing and lyrics- not really knowing which way to go and how to go about continuing- not really knowing what to blog about the past couple months- feeling stuck again- getting to a point that i can feel and see and hear the changes that i have worked hard on the past year and realizing that everything is happening for a reason- that is how life seems to work- just when i think i learned more and feel good the next challenge comes and goes- i gotta believe this is like a tapestry and each stitch has a purpose and is important for the WHOLE- emotions are up and down and rampant every week...

RANDOM LYRIC- no title- no chorus - let's see what happens....

kicked outta bars, kicked outta the stars, fired on the job, but on fire like my  color bling
yes color is my tithe and offerings, human with comfort for life and peeps close to me
who brought us to here and now, why are we here to prove? what? how?
we tire of things that try to complete the we and tire of energy being sucked from my cellular being
my atoms and dna are shifting into place as i investigate these unmoralistic ways
got cancer on the brain and cancer in my veins, and cancer in the most voluptuous place
females, get ya titties pressed, get ya kitties in check, let's  stir-up this mess
yes!- we a conglomerate, a mass of complete back ass, yaaaaaaaas
fucked to the core if i look at it like a whore and look it it like a negative nancy who’s poor
yet perfect peppermint patties we think we mint condition, until... there’s  cruel inflictions 
all just a game to get you to submit, so get on your knees and take it like a bitch
we bow to the nielsen ratings so quick, need to be bowing to the soul - get ya  inner fix
me like a drug, we all want a quick fix, but it takes community to strike it rich
and it takes immunity to resist, and it takes lack of order to get it straight- that’s the glitch
so switch it up and quit the coast to coast passiveness , get that active itch
we all want the same free vip pass to get in and feel a little important - yes
it’s my planet so i do what seems fit but i also count on you and your leadership 
hear that cali will break off one day, i heard the planet will melt away,
got my car plugged into electric waves, trying to console my neighbor whose separated from her family far away,
trying to understand how we got so divided in a nation with altruistic ways,
crying over the words that people are putting in the air waves, feeling so hurt by this humanity,
feel like an animal at a human shelter, ready to die from materialistic gains
ready to fly from realistic mainframe, but confused a whole lot and tainted by reality show fames,
social media that’s profane, rants and rage from cyber space and you tube plays-
toxic ways- wtf - feel like we breaking away and breaking from what can potentially be shades of grey-
hey- maybe this is the ways it’s suppose to be- drop to the low before you get real high?
so sick you might die, then death subsides? 360 and a prize for all that waits on the other side-
if i believe that everything happens for a reason and everyone is doing the best that they know how
at every single moment in time, what does that mean for eternity? can we really all hold hands or get to the magical place
where everyone has an awesome fate? Do the wheels keep churning and we need to see death and prosperity
​to turn the earth and rise? what do we all really need to stay alive? 

so life continues after the stage fades to black- this is all like my own reality show but noone is taping- i gain pleasure knowing i am the only one watching until i am ready to put it out in the air waves 

this #livinginthemoment honestly feels like a wreck most days right now, but, always seems to supply me with a grand vision because something happens every day that i feel totally grateful for-  my tattoos "with love" and "with grace and gratitude" are truly a reminder to how awesome life can be when you just exist and participate- i am merely a speck of dust on this planet and there is so much out there to be seen and done! don't get me wrong, I am super hopeful and have a positive outlook for the future and am excited to experience all that awaits me- just taking time to get used to emotions and feelings and all the stuff that has been bottled up for so long- time for everything to escape me- i have been like a jailor to myself all these years and the tides are turning for the best version of me- little did i understand that it REALLY is all up to ME! the feeling to feel free to create whatever you see fit to serve you is really liberating and scary at the same time- old ways creep up but then vanish like the grim reaper in the night- dark fades to light and another day greets me like a gift i can't quite wrap my head around....

so please join me and all the milleneals by taking a few #selfies to celebrate YOU and TODAY and the FUTURE- feeling #hopeful

now can someone PLEASE tell me HOW to take a BUTT selfie? this is the best i could do- still learning... :)

thanks for being interested- listening- and most of all being part of the magical cancer chain that is sparking and will burst into an awesome and delightful future for all who participate- my closing words might look something like this...

take time to slow down and take care of you- you are where the beginning starts- a fully thriving you can make a HUGE impact on the world......

​thx- Tami xo