A self Journey through dealing with Cancer and how it can Impact your LIFE positively.
Seeing life from different colored glasses has sure been helpful. It doesn't happen overnight, but imagine if you could change the way you feel and think? That is part of the self-help stuff I have been working on week after week. I always thought I was pretty smart when it came to relating to people and having a unique intuition and putting myself in other peoples shoes. I was, but not nearly as much as I thought I was. I am learning to say I don't know and that's ok. No more time for trying to be right and feeling the need to prove myself. What was I doing and thinking? I completely wasted time and energy on this for many years. It steered a part of my life and created fear for no reason. I think my new motto in this realm is "who cares". Not that i don't care about anything, but as soon as you truly stop caring about being right or needing to have the correct answer or feeling the need to prove yourself, you are living a more fruitful and free life. I am sure this could be applicable for many pressures we put on ourselves.
We have learned and soaked in all the stuff from the past and we are here now. Everyone does the best they can at every moment in time. This is not time for the blame game. We have to be responsible for ourselves. We come to forks in the road and/or have moments of cloudiness, and/or act in certain ways that are displeasing to our soul. What do we do? Ride it out and let the emotion pass and keep doing what we are doing? Well let me tell you that is what I had been doing the past 10 years and it didn't work out so well. But if I put my yellow sunshine glasses on I can also say in the same breath that yes it got me here and I am starting to see and feel positive changes. In my house, nowadays these ideas are rumbling loudly... The idea that everything happens for a reason. The idea that what you put out is what you get back. The idea of taking charge of your own life and self. The idea of taking responsibility for your actions, words, and decisions. I call this Karma. I don't necessarily believe in reincarnation but it is fun to think about it. I think of Karma as the whole process of living life, learning life, learning about yourself, and taking strides to create the best version of yourself along the way. We all know it has it's ups and downs and when those downs are showing up repetitively in our lives, we can use it as a sign that something needs to change. This calls for self awareness.
If we cannot take a look at ourselves and help and treat ourselves in a loving manner then the world will never change. We will never change. We will never be free. We will never be truly happy. We will be stuck and stuck in " groundhog days". That is what I am happily moving out of and understanding. I thought I was self aware, but I had on some big a++ blinders. I made excuses and beat myself up and continued unhealthy patterns knowing it was not getting me where I wanted to be in life. I think a zombie took over my life for a hot minute. Well, lots of hot minutes. It's kind of awesome though because when you have your realizations and aha moments you start to change you, which then leaves room to create a new you, which then leaves room to create a new day, which then leaves room to create a new life, which then leaves room to really start to help create a new world. It really is a simple process that seems so complex. It's kinda like when I was telling my mom what I was using to clean my sink countertop nowadays. I was the queen of cleaning and would get out the bleach and tilex and mr. clean and windex, and soak up the toxic chemical fumes cause I just really wanted the house to be clean. That is what I knew. Then cancer came and after I learned and investigated about toxic chemicals, I changed. I also had to learn that the "New" clean smell around the house was actually clean. It was no longer the chemical and fragrance that were in all the cleaning bottles. So my answer to my mother was.... "i used soap and water". Who woulda thunk that the old fashioned soap and water would get my countertop just as clean. A simple solution. The lesson for me is that I got sucked up in all these modern day "fix its" and it was contributing to my life in very negative ways. We want everything quick and fast and a magic pill. It seems as though long gone are the days when you actually take the long route that is solid, trustworthy, proven to work, and often the journey of it is the fun part that adds to feeling fulfilled and complete. All you have to do is let yourself.....
I am getting off point here so let's recap. We are all wonderful human beings. We made it here alive and we ARE here for a REASON. So what is yours? What will you do with you? What will you do with your life? How will you contribute? Point is we may be lost a bit sometimes but it is possible to find the way. It just takes old fashioned effort and time. Imagine that. Envision a new you and a new life. What does it look and feel like? Now make a plan and try to start moving forward. Start with creating a great you!
As always, thanks for reading and listening.