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More than a feeling….

12/22/2020

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Yes Steve Miller is on my road trip music playlist. I love it! Along with Eagles, Beyonce, Nina Simone, Guns-n-Roses, Louis Armstrong, Tom Petty, Jill Scott, the Roots, Common, Lauren Hill, Def Leppard, Teddy Pendergrass, Ed Sheeran, Cyndi Lauper, Wu Tang, Wyclef, Roots, Otis Redding, Bee Gees, Van Morrison, Marvin Gaye, Erykah Badu, and the list continues to grow. These songs continue to journey along with me road after road, highway after highway, city after city, state after state. We are now the bestest of friends. Music has always been a staple in my life and has been the outlet to be and feel the most free and connected with myself and the universal flow of things. Music moves my body in certain ways and also leads my mind into pure feelings of living in the moment. I love it. Why am I talking about music? I dunno I guess cuz I listen to it every single day and it has been a life saver and best friend to me in this lifetime. It is soothing at times and stimulating at times and joyful all of the time. Music has bridged the gap many times when I am not sure, happy, sad, or not feeling quite my self and has helped connect me with my soul in a way that nothing else can. It spans past getting through feelings and goes to a place that has helped me build and believe in myself. I am so thankful.  


Me and Music have rendezvoused every day in this lifetime. I have had the most joyous times with music on-stage and traveling and socializing with friends. You could say music has been a solid building block in my life. Point is, I think everyone has something that helps connect them and tune them into who we are being, how we are living, and our purpose. We have emotions and they come and go but they also let us know where we are at like a GPS. These feelings can be steered so hopefully we pick the things that steer us in directions that feel good. Hopefully we pick the music that eases the mind and leads our thoughts into a place of happiness.  Hopefully we pick the music that can ease and comfort us in times of darkness. Hopefully we can pick the music that lifts us up and inspires us to keep going. Hopefully we pick the music that helps us celebrate and create blissful realities. 


The feelings that emerge are then transferred into our thought and our reality. Life can be so joyous and easy if we just let it be. I admit I like to steer the ship, but have been humbled by all that surrounds me and learned that I can be the best if I only steer my own ship. Also, the idea that I have the power to steer my own ship has been  pretty enlightening. I realize there is a lot I do not know and that it’s never gonna get done. I was always a “try harder” “do more” type of person. That wasn't working out so well for me. I am learning to ease into life and enjoy, let go, let be, and open myself up to receive what is next for me time after time. It’s grace in the works. This slow as a turtle process has lead me to the most powerful gift of all, the belief in myself and humanity. I truly see the goodness. Sometimes it has a very creative mask and it is a little tougher to see, but it’s always there. At least that’s what I believe. Some may perceive this as being a  softie but I ride the quiet waves and just observe life and people and places and things. IT all makes complete sense to me. 


I hope to continue sharing my experiences and bask in music together with everyone. We are all deserved and can help lift each other up to places higher than we can even imagine. I look forward to the journey and watching us all fly.


​tami
xo
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Welcome to the Edge of the Waters...

12/5/2020

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Today I walked the lakefront and beaches of the Chi. It’s cold, mild, yet mother nature seems to always kick into high gear when you go on a stroll. I had no intention of exercising , just wanted to get out, listen to music in my headphones, look at nature and be. It was good. I found myself going from no thought and just absorbing the lakefront to totaling in my mind and thinking about feel good thoughts. Analyzing as us Virgos typically do. I replayed scenarios of love, listened to Teddy Pendergrass and Beyonce and felt my future. I absorbed all the waves and trees and sand and paths and other people strolling as I did. I re-imagined what it felt like to bike the same path in the summertime. It felt good.

The water always amazes me. No matter where I am. It feels soothing yet speaks to me and my emotions and relates to how I am feeling on the inside. I walked out on the concrete pier and watched the big dark waves ripple back one after another. They felt kinda wild and anxious. I could relate. When I watched intently, they looked and acted kinda like I felt on the inside. I have an ongoing joke with Lake Michigan and it is that when the waves get big, they are MAD. Something is going on that is not being resolved and they lash out at LSD. I understand and just let them be. 

My stroll turned into 2 hours. It felt good to just walk in Chicago and get out of the house. It’s funny how being inside vs. being outside can change your feeling in an instant. I love it! I found myself feeling extra thankful and everything seemed to blend together and nothing really had a name. My phone was irrelevant except the playing of music and typing down the random words and lyrics coming to my head as I walked. It was really great. The cool thing is I had on a mask, scarf, hat and winter coat and felt no cold or breeze. I was kinda digging the mask and it’s warmth. I thought about my family, my new love, my band mates, my gym friends, my acquaintances and realized how full my life has been. I had endless chats about what was and what is and what could be and felt thankful that I had everything I had asked for right here right now and felt satiated and full of life. I felt clarity as I thought of my new love and how I am still learning about life and relationships and how to really see and appreciate and be in the moment and just let be. It felt good. 

I am not sure what this blog means other than be in the moment and water really floats my boat? :) I am human and had an “off” weekend but as soon as I realize that I can connect with myself and plug myself back in everything seems to resolve and absolve. It’s like magic. I just can’t believe it. I realize that when I feel not so good it’s usually me. I realize that I have the control to really set my brain free. I feel guilty that I acted ridiculously, but then realize I am human and hope that people can see that in me. I get scared people will run from me but then quickly turn to the universe and realize that what’s meant to be will be. I have to continue to let go time after time cuz my human reactions seem to take over and emotions flow. It’s kinda like riding waves and you don’t know what will happen cuz you can’t control mother nature. It’s like wading in the waters and looking out and realizing that the water is endless. When you connect with that endless, you realize that you are  a spec and spark here on earth. If you just go with the flow, everything will seem and be alright. So when you look out at the daylight, sunset, or sunrise, and see where it meets the earth, it’s eternity you are looking at, I think. It’s never done and never ending and it’s beautiful and mysterious and feels easy and pure. I think this is where water meets us and we feel eternity. The place where we all remain and are but often have trouble feeling it so we go into our humanistic ways and continue each day. I hope I can meet you all at the edge of the water, cuz it feels really great, and we can really enjoy each other every day.

Can I get a witness? :)
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Our own personalized GPS….

12/3/2020

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It’s a collision of The Law of Attraction, the belief that positive or negative thoughts bring positive or negative experiences into a person's life and The Global Positioning System, GPS, which is a satellite-based radionavigation system owned by the United States government and operated by the United States Space Force according to wikipedia. Hopefully these words below will linger in our minds the next time we sit in our cars and punch in our next location. :)


If we compare these 2 entities, the law of attraction also has destinations, our positive and negative thoughts are part of the navigation. So it’s our choice essentially, we punch in our desire or destination and then go…. Life happens and we have emotions and our mind starts to be busy with negative or positive thoughts.  We are potentially steering ourself and we have control over our self-destination. I’m not gonna lie, I get lost sometimes. There is a learning curve, just like when we get a new electronic and we swipe and type and punch around to figure it out, it’s the same thing. I say re-route when you start feeling not so good. Remember the original destination and why you wanted to be there and how it feels.


I think it takes tools to get down our own personalized navigation systems. We have monkey minds and they just need to be tamed and steered. How? Well, for one I say meditate. From my own personal experience it has helped me tremendously. I am now a savvy Buddha mind that gets derailed once in awhile. However, the whole point is the crashes are VERY small and I know how to pick up the pieces and keep moving forward quickly. The appearance of being lost is often a blessing in disguise. The appearance of being out of control is just a feeling that goes away. The road rage is minimal because I know that I am in control of me and nobody else and that everyone is doing the best they can at every moment in time with what they know. It’s acceptance and letting go that make the journeys and trips easy and joyous and allows me to be in the moment and live life fully. The car I am driving is well taken care of from the inside out. AND, when I have drivers along with me… well I am still working on that one.

​
Point is we create our own realties. If we are wizards, then my goal is to be the best wizard in the world. Learning how to be the best me, the best me for we, create and maintain the best mindset, to be open and a peaceful warrior, to be expansive and love at all times, to let go, and the ability to be ok with everything has been an emotional process with many ups and downs. Every single time I am now able to steer back to  the middle ground where everything is ok. Where love is the majority. Where I am connected and feeling happy. Where the world looks bright and sunny. Where love just shows up at the door. We have desires and continue to ask for what we want. That is part of what makes the world tick.

So next time we get into our cars, let our smiles radiate when we punch in our next location. Let’s look forward to what can and will be. Let’s look forward to the journey. Let’s make pitstops and see what’s out there. Let’s be still and quiet for a moment so we can see and hear clearly. Let’s observe and take it all in and keep it moving. Let’s play and laugh and have fun. After all, we are all connected and all part of each other so if we all stay in this zone life can and will be wonderful.
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Approaching another learning curve….

12/1/2020

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Diving into the unknown can be scary. Why would we do it then? To knock out fears, to expand as human beings, to move ourselves forward, to grow and learn, to really live life fully, to feel and experience all we can, to eliminate boundaries and be free. That list sounds pretty good to me so that is the approach I take each time life hands me twists and turns and dips and dives and curves.

We are specs on this earth living as human beings and we have created this insurmountable list of rules and regulations for ourselves to follow, so there is order instead of chaos? There are so many human beings that it is too great to overcome law and order in this lifetime, but it doesn’t have to be this way. However, there will always be universal order and human chaos. Many perspectives, many sides, many ideas, many solutions, many leaders, and many beautiful moments that can fill up our lives. Can we keep moving forward and enjoy what is and put on our happy glasses? Can we just be ourselves and enjoy all that exists? Can we successfully get out of our own ways and let everyone have their own ways and just let it be?  Can we say what we want out loud and just let it come to fruition? Can we let go of “what was” and live right now and enjoy our time? Can we appreciate one another and all the perspectives that exist and remain at ease? Can we build something fresh and new without boundaries?
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Sooo many questions. Yes! The answer is yes to all of them! At least that is my belief and perspective. If we create our own realities then yes the answer can be yes. If we remain followers and stay in bounds and follow rules and regulations all the time then the answer would be no. At least that is my personal experience. I suppose some will disagree. I am ok with that. I suppose some will ask how do we get there? I understand. I suppose some are already living without boundaries. I think we can approach this with how we utilize and manage our minds, our bodies, our senses, our emotions, and how we can have a consistent connection with ourselves. Once this is stable, we create a freedom that smells of flowers, tastes sweet, sounds soothing, feels easy and soft, and looks divine. Every single moment can be THIS for all of us.

According to Rules of the Road, as you approach a curve, move to the side of your lane opposite of the direction of the curve. As you continue through the curve, position your vehicle towards the other side of your lane. I like this analogy. A translation might be… you see life’s ‘curve ahead, you grab the wheel and cruise through it, you remain calm and continue on, you steer yourself to a safe and feel good place, you passed the curve and continue on! I think it takes practice just like we would practice before taking our driver test. But this is more grand cuz it’s a “ life license “ and we get to create our own reality instead of following rules. If there was a rule, I suppose I would say it is  universal law of attraction. Simply put, the Law of Attraction is the belief that positive or negative thoughts bring positive or negative experiences into a person's life. This is where our minds can serve us well. Just like our muscles, we can exercise and train our minds. So perhaps a starting point when we ask how do we get started and to this place of freedom we can ask ourselves… what do we feed our minds and how do we train our minds? I will go out on a limb and say there is a lot of fear mongering that exists… if we approach this curve we can stay in control of our minds by being our own leaders instead of following. There are ways to be and stay safe and protected and respect all that is around us. If we start with ourselves, the root cause and effect, I think the world would feel and look very bright and shiny. It’s a start. There is no finish line. It’s a consistent flow. It’s never done. So we might as well accept divine order and just let it be and enjoy.
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    Author

    Tami Herbst xo

    It's a long story.
    I have documented parts of my Cancer Journey starting in November 2015.

    This is  " living story" about how I choose to live with cancer and use it as a means to be my most authentic self and  create a joyous life. These are my personal experiences, opinions, and beliefs about chronic disease and how we all have the power to self-heal. My intention is to give hope, inspiration, and examples of possibility so people can find the strength and information to make informed decisions based on their personal beliefs and needs regarding health. The overall goal is to help ease personal suffering and help people discover that a   happy, healthy, and abundant life awaits them.

    ​Thanks for reading!


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